본 연구의 목적은 배우자를 자살로 잃은 여성의 경험과 그 의미를 탐색하는 것이다. 연구참여자들은 대도시에 거주하는 여성 5명으로 모두 최근 3년 이내에 남편을 자살로 잃었다. 자료의 수집은 개별심층면담을 통해 이루어졌으며 자료의 분석은 Giorgi(1985)의 현상학적 4단계에 의거하였다. 연구결과 4개의 핵심주제와 15개의 공통상위주제가 도출되었다. 핵심주제는 <이제야 선명해지는 남편의 자살신호-자살과 관련된 남편의 특성에 대한 참여자의 지각>, <내 남편은 만들어진 운명의 희생자-남편의 죽음에 대한 참여자의 해석과 수용>, <안팎으로 불구가 된 나-사별로 인한 참여자의 고통>, <죽음으로 기운 인생의 저울에서 생의 추 끌어올리기-회복 그리고 남겨진 삶 살아내기>로 나타났다. 이 결과를 바탕으로 연구참여자가 경험한 내용과 그 의미에 대해 논의했고, 해석학적 글쓰기를 시도함으로써 이들의 경험을 더 상세하게 묘사했다. 마지막으로 배우자 자살사별자들의 회복을 위해 사회와 임상장면에서 요구되는 역할과 함께 본 연구의 제한점과 후속 연구의 방향에 대해 논의했다.
The purpose of this study was to give a better understanding about the essential experience of bereaved women by spouse's suicide. Five participants who live in urban areas are women and they lost their spouses by suicide. Collecting data was based on the in-depth interviews of the participants and the collected data set is analyzed by Giorgi(1985)'s phenomenological fourth phase. The results showed four core themes and fifteen superordinate themes. The four core themes are as follows: <Spouses' suicide signs that finally became distinct : the participants' perceptions about spouses' characteristics related with suicide>, <My husband is a victim of the given fate: interpretation and acceptance of spouse's death>, <I am totally disabled: suffering of the participants by spouse's death>, <Pulling up a weight of life slanted toward death: living a life as being left alone and recovering a messed up life>. Based on these results, the meanings and essence of the five participants' experience were discussed. And hermeneutic writing was attempted in order to describe better the experience of bereaved women by spouse's suicide. Finally, required roles of our current society and clinical intervention were suggested. Furthermore, some limitations of this study and the directions for future research were discussed.
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